Hi, I’m Dr. Parik Patel, BA, CFA, ACCA, Esq. If you don’t know me already, I’m a Chartered FinMeme Analyst (CFA) with a particular expertise in #stonk valuation (pro-tip: just multiply by two). Anyways, I’ve been told that I have a particularly special insight into the world of finance and memes, so the team at Bullish asked me to create a regular round-up to help explain what the hell happened this week… and then offer my “diagnosis” of the virality.
This week was once again action-packed with GameStop making its perennial return. Fears surrounding treasury yields started to subside, and — much to our relief — tech began to recover. And finally, at the tender age of 90, Warren Buffett made an epic comeback, becoming the sixth member of the $100 billion club.
Once again, big stuff is going down, but what does it all MEME? Without further ado, let’s dive into Dr. Parik’s Meme Diagnosis of the Week…
Summary: After almost a month of persistent declines, tech stocks made a roaring comeback, with the NASDAQ 100 up over 6% from its recent lows. Tesla ($TSLA), which was down more than 35% from its highs, is back on the rise — up more than 24% this past week.
Dr. Parik’s Diagnosis: The age old adage to “buy the f*cking dip” has just been proven correct once again. After all, as Dave Portnoy so eloquently proclaimed, stocks only go up….
Summary: The game just doesn’t seem to stop, with the popular video game retailer $GME once again making a perennial return. The stock was up more than 113% this week to hit a new all time high of $348.50 before plunging to $248 soon after.
Dr. Parik’s Diagnosis: Those with diamond hands were rewarded once more whilst those with paper hands missed out on some incredible tendies. As for me? My thesis is simple: I like the stock.
Summary: If you ever feel bad about an investment that didn’t quite play out the way you wanted it to, think back to this story. The commodities trader Mercuria Energy Group Ltd. was swindled out of $36 million after its copper shipment from a Turkish supplier was found to contain nothing more than painted rocks.
Dr. Parik’s Diagnosis: Personally, I think this is just one big misunderstanding. After all, according to the crypto community, gold is just a shiny rock. Perhaps copper is the same?
Summary: Warren Buffett, who the investment community thought was ~out of it~ for underperforming the S&P 500 for the last decade, just became the sixth member to join the $100 billion club, putting him amongst Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk, Bill Gates, Bernard Arnault, and Mark Zuckerberg. At one point, in 2008, the 90-year-old was the richest man in the world, overtaking Bill Gates who had topped the list for 13 consecutive years. Things have since changed, of course.
Dr. Parik’s Diagnosis: I find it truly staggering that individuals are allowed to accumulate such massive amounts of wealth. Warren Buffett could literally give each person on Earth a billion dollars and still have $93 billion left over*. Unfathomably greedy.
(*I have since been told that my math is apparently wrong.)
Summary: A Dr. Parik column wouldn’t be complete without a snide dig at value investing. That shit is for boomers only — like the Royal Family. I’ve heard the Queen is a big deep value investor who looks for stocks trading below book value. With the underperformance associated with that kind of investing, no wonder Harry and Meghan left…
Dr. Parik’s Diagnosis: Value investing underperforms and destroys families. Why would you ever choose to be a value investor when you could invest in $GME and make 100% returns in a week?
So there you have it! This was the week in memes. Now here’s what the doctor is prescribing:
- Always buy the dip
- Double check your math before tweeting
- Never be a value investor
~ Dr. PP out